Indecision and its determiner, speculation, are major sources of human suffering: the coulda, woulda, shoulda’s, or the never ending pros and cons list. Indecision causes stagnation in our life and stagnation brings about depression and destruction. Like the rest of the Universe, we need movement, flow and reciprocation. We do not want to WAIT in life, for anything, ever. We want to tune into our intuition and take action immediately. Now, we must also expand our definition of action: for example, sometimes the intuitive hit we’ll receive will be to rest for a moment and gather information, and if so, that is the immediate action we take.
THE DECISIVENESS DIRECTIVE | a 7-day experiment
You can start with smaller more inconsequential choices:
Should I run or do Yoga?
Should I cook or order in?
Should I call or text?
Should I learn piano or photography?
Should I meditate or return emails?
Take at least 30 seconds to a minute for the following:
Get still and quiet, eyes closed, hand on your heart and take some deep breaths. Then ask yourself, which choice contains the greater charm? Which choice pulls me towards it, just that little bit more?
The charming choice may or may not be the one that makes the most logical sense. For example, I’m sure you’ve had the following experiences: “It doesn’t make sense but for some reason, it just feels right,” or, “It makes all the sense in the world, but something about it doesn’t feel right.” That FEELING is what you are looking for. It will often show up in the chest or the gut but it could also show up somewhere else in the body.
Once detected, drop the other choice like a hot potato, forget it and move immediately in the direction of the charm containing choice. Ask yourself, “What action can I take, TODAY, however great or small, to move me in the direction of that greater charm?”
Now, lets say you can’t yet detect which choice contains greater charm: the mind is still super loud, the pros and cons seem to be even, you’re afraid of both sets of cons, and you just can’t seem to make a choice: flip a coin or eeny, meeny, miny, moe it! Whichever one is chosen, drop the other choice like a hot potato and take immediate action towards the chosen choice. Do not speculate.
You may ask, “What if I make the wrong choice?” The great part is, there is no time machine for you to go back and experience how life would have been if you had made the other choice: you’ll never know! So leap into the choice that feels right in the moment and if you don’t like how it pans out, then make another choice. The alternative is to stagnate, speculate and suffer.
This is an experiment in order to gather your own evidence as to the outcomes and experience of your decisiveness. Then based on your evidence, you can then decide to start applying this method towards greater, more “consequential” choices:
Should I speak up or hold my tongue?
Should I move to a different state or stay here?
Should I quit or stay in my job?
Should I take this new opportunity or not?
Should I end or stay in this relationship?
Detect charm - Take Action.
At the end of life, we will not regret the things we tried, that maybe didn’t work out.
Yet we may very well regret the things we never tried.
Waiting is over. It is time for charm directed action.
Wade Robson, based on his personal experience of external wins and internal losses, explores our personal definitions of WINNING and their implications.